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Training for the Bronze- Confessions From a Recovering Perfectionist

I am a recovering perfectionist. In fact, I thought I would be an A+ mother before becoming a mom. However, within minutes after my child was born, the illusion of control vanished before my eyes.

Brené Brown reminds us there is a big difference in trying your best versus seeking perfection. Interestingly, in a recent study, bronze medalists in the Olympics were discovered to be happier compared to the silver medalists (Hedgcock, Luangrath, Webster).

I learned of this study from the book, “The Mayo Clinic Guide to Stress-Free Living” by Dr. Amit Sood. It got me thinking, perhaps I should train for the bronze. When focusing on gold, I value an imaginary judge’s score while failing to observe my true audience. In reality, our kids will not give us perfect 10’s anyway. 

What is “perfection” anyway? It is very subjective. Your perfect day may not be my perfect day and vice versa. There is so much desire for control in attaining the A+.

Deepak Chopra writes about the “Law of Least Effort”. In other words, the path of least resistance. For example, seeds just grow and so do our babies. Similarly, I perform music better when at ease. The beauty of music lies within the musician who plays naturally. The notes flow from the music sheet to the brain back to the audience.

Our audience (children) watch and listen all the time. It is easy to hyper focus on perfection. However, it is when we embrace imperfection and the journey of motherhood we can listen to the beautiful music it creates. In third place.

A few quotes I like:

“Best is the enemy of good” –Voltaire

“Perfection is the lowest standard out there because it is unattainable.” -Mensah Oteh

What are your thoughts?

Thanks for taking the time to read! “To Mom is To Love” mission is to support, encourage, and empower each other as imperfect moms to love as a verb. Subscribe for the latest updates on To Mom is To Love podcasts and writing.


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