In my latest podcast episode, Paula Liub and I discuss details of living in the present and what meditation really is. As it turns out, there are many types of meditation! And you do not have to be "good" at any of them! It is simply bringing increased awareness to your internal thoughts through a variety of ways.
Meditation shines a light on your own self-talk. Mine frequently needs a bit of adjustment. How about yours?
Dr. Bolte Taylor in her book, My Stroke of Insight, compares negative self-talk to a child waving a stick. If we tell him or her to stop, he will for a second, but then he will proceed to do it again. My son LOVES sticks. He will collect them and build all sorts of designs. The sticks keep coming too. I don't know where he finds them, but they just appear! Similar to our thoughts, sticks come from seemingly nowhere and the mind is fascinated by them!
Dr. Ron Siegel reminds us in his book, The Mindfulness Solution, it takes practice to identify a thought as "just a thought." Try not to give it much weight. He suggests to close your eyes and take note of your head's vocalizations. Think of these thoughts as any other sound from the outside. For example, air blowng through trees, a dog barking, or a refrigerator humming. This helps keep our focus on the external world, as opposed to being held hostage by internal ruminations.. We then can appreciate the moment for what it is as well as be less absorbed in our minds.
We take ourselves too seriously. Dr. Ron Siegel also points the importance of play and the present moment. Our kids have no issues with this! However, focus on the moment does decreae as the child's age increases. Already at two years of age, toddlers know of the future and past. For example, if my toddler wants a doll, it is harder to distract her from it than it was when she was one. She now knows that there is still a doll that exists, despite the present distraction. Dr. Ron Siegel states that this ability to imagine the future or past intensifies with each passing year until we become adults. Now fully grown, it is difficult to stay in the present for long periods.
Dr. Ron Siegel also points out that work is practical and future oriented, whereas play does not have a goal. It is the setting where we can truy meet our kids (and ourselves).
How can you live in the moment today?
Thanks for taking the time to read! To Mom is To Love mission is to support, encourage, and empower each other as imperfect moms to love as a verb.
References:
My Stroke of Insight: A Brain Scientist's Personal Journey by Dr. Jill Bolte-Taylor
The Mindfulness Solution: Everyday Practices for Every Day Problems by Dr. Ronald D. Siegel
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